Missing Time

When I was in my office at the church before service this past Sunday, I happened to notice how my desk calendar was still on March. And then when I was leaving my office after the service, I realized my winter wreath was still hanging on my office door. I hadn’t swapped it out for the spring wreath because I’ve been working from home since the middle of March. It was jarring and slightly disorienting to see these small and sad reminders of how much has changed. It’s as though back in March we hit the ‘pause’ button on the world as we knew it and either flipped to a different channel or fell asleep and have been living through some surreal other world.

Seeing my calendar stuck back on March made me feel like there was a missing block of time in my memory. I had that feel you get from one of those reoccurring dreams about having to take a final for a class you forgot to attend or showing up to church on Sunday having forgotten to write a sermon. You know, those dreams that give you a moment of panic.

But as days stretched into weeks and weeks have stretched into months; as winter gave way to spring and spring is giving way to summer, we’ve discovered this isn’t a dream. As we’re still discovering the contours of this new landscape and continue doing our best to ride the emotional highs and lows of such a dramatic shift, we’re starting to wonder what comes next.

The world is slowly waking back up. It’s trying to figure out how to hit the ‘play’ button again, but it’s not as simple as changing the channel. Everyone is struggling to make sense of where we go from here because we can’t just restart the world like nothing happened. As much as I want to skip ahead and rip a few extra pages off my calendar to hurry this process along, it’s not that easy.

In the end, I didn’t turn any pages of my calendar and I didn’t swap out the wreath on my door. While I’m eager to see all of you and miss you dearly, I pray we all continue practicing resurrection and navigating our way through this in-between as best we can.

As we prepare to celebrate Pentecost this week, we honor the Spirit that gave birth to the church and has continued to carry her through history’s most distressing times. Even when those who purported to be “the church” were the cause of distress, the Spirit kept the good news alive in the hearts and minds of those truly bearing Christ’s love to the world. In that Spirit, may we embody God’s love for the world and each other.

In Love,
Pastor Annette